Thank you to all of you who have offered prayers and support to me through my recent medical drama. I am home now, and feeling so much better. Every day, I am gaining strength, and I am so grateful to be alive. Thanks be to God for the gift of healing!
As promised, I’m going to be sharing some thoughts on my experiences here. These are longer writings that take a bit of time and effort, and so they will be behind the paywall. This is the first part here today, but I have more that will be coming later this week. If you have ever wanted to support me and my work, this would be a great time to do that. I would be so grateful. Let’s stay fully connected here!
It’s almost like I knew it was coming. I really didn’t, but I can look back at some of the horrific things I experienced in the past two weeks and know that for every minute of it, I was truly in God’s loving hands.
For starters, as you know, I have been revisiting the Diary of Saint Faustina, reading it slowly, a few pages a day, for a couple of months now. This re-reading has highlighted for me not only the precious gift of Jesus’ personal love, but the necessity of abandoning ourselves to his will. Even if it hurts. I have been pondering the idea of suffering, fascinated by Faustina’s earnestness when she refers to suffering as “the greatest treasure on earth.” I must admit to finding that perspective a little challenging. Fascinating, but challenging.
Early in the week that I got sick, I felt OK. On Sunday of that week, I returned from a weekend trip to Louisiana where I spoke at a marriage conference, and I was doing a quick turnaround at home, un-packing and then re-packing for a trip to New York City for a multi-day work event starting the next day. I was “busy mama,” getting stuff done, and didn’t have time to pause and think about how I was feeling. I mean, maybe my stomach hurt a little bit, but who could even be sure? I arrived in New York and checked into my hotel on Monday evening. I ordered dinner, but didn’t finish it. I felt…maybe just a little bit gross? Whatever. I was fine.
Tuesday was a long day filled with meetings, workshops, and presentations. Late in the afternoon, when I heard about the event’s evening entertainment of live music at the rooftop bar across the street, I declined. I was tired, but I also wanted to get some work done.
Specifically, I wanted to record podcasts. With my son’s upcoming wedding May 18, I knew I needed to be working a little more ahead than I have been. I had packed my recording equipment in my carry-on and prepped notes for several episodes.
First, though, I had a quick video call to Australia. I was meeting with a new potential partner for the Girlfriends podcast, a custom Bible cover manufacturer. Evenings on the east coast were mornings for them, and we had decided this timing would work. My daughter Gabby has been helping me with this side of business for the podcast, setting up these calls for me, and it has been a great way to meet small Catholic business owners and potential podcast partners.
We had a great conversation, though I did need to pause at one point and mute my microphone because I was coughing? Or gagging? I wasn’t really sick, but what the heck was going on with me? Whatever. I was fine.
After the call, I texted Dan. “Do I have to eat dinner?” Not something I typically wonder about. “Yes,” came his immediate reply.
I ordered dinner and I started recording podcasts. I sat in that chair for three and a half hours and recorded four podcasts. I felt driven to get it done. When I stood up afterwards, though, a sharp pain in my right side made me sit back down quickly. I tried standing more slowly and found that I needed to remain hunched over a bit. I didn’t want dinner. I wondered if I was going to throw up? Whatever. I was…fine. I took a shower and went to bed.
At about 3AM, I awoke, drenched in sweat, with scorching pain on the lower right side of my abdomen. I threw off the covers and half expected to see flames coming from my side. It was a searing, scorching pain. I shivered in the air conditioning, feeling both hot and cold at the same time. This is a fever, I thought groggily, typing symptoms into my phone. Appendicitis. For the first time since first feeling the pain, I considered this. I might need to go to the hospital.
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